In the old, old days, women stayed at home with their family, and their mother and father, until they were married. Men did too. They helped with the farm, the mill, the animals, the family business - whatever it may have been - and they helped out with the family home and family members. Elderly were cared for, children were cared for, single men and women had a place in their family and their church, their community and their society. And it was okay.

A long time ago, and probably it happened a lot before it was noticed on a larger scale, some men and women left home without being married and starting their own family. They left for work in the factories or the mines or cities, or they left to go to war or to do mission work. Some went to places of higher learning and became professors, doctors and lawyers. Elderly parents or those who couldn't care for themselves were cared for by other family members or someone in the community. Or an asylum of some kind. Sometimes the ones who left would send financial support. Sometimes they would start a whole new family in a new place, without an extended family nearby. And it was okay.

Some young men and women stayed at home though, and carried on the family tradition of making families who stayed or travelled together. And that was okay too.

Not so long ago, in some places, it was expected and often demanded that all children, upon reaching a certain age, were supposed to move out of their family home, whether they were planning to start a family of their own or not. Usually, it was preferred that they not be planning a family, but rather go off on their own. Whether it was for school or career, warfare or mission work, parents felt pride if their offspring went off on their own. Offspring seldom stayed near the parents or grandparents, and as time went on, there were so many parents and grandparents for one child to keep track of, all living in different places, it was best to merely maintain friendships. Sometimes the extended family is financially cared for, or visited. And, maybe, it is still okay. Sort of.

Family is a relative term these days. No pun intended. A travelling sports team. A group of workers from one office. A shelter full of runaways. A group of friends who have at least one thing in common.

I think a lot of things have changed that make it hard on everyone. We can't go back. "It is what it is" they say.

As an old fashioned person, I find it kind of sad.